6 Books That Made Us Think Differently About Motherhood
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Motherhood is complicated. Often stretching these caregivers in both predictable and unimaginable ways. They kiss skinned knees, help with math homework, soothe broken hearts, show up for their romantic partners, and climb professional ladders, sometimes at the same time. And that’s just your average Tuesday. Digging into the countless layers of motherhood can seem herculean, yet crucial to understand how to best honor and support all of the mothers in our lives. Fortunately, authors are casting a spotlight on the kaleidoscopic complexity that comes along with becoming a mom—and debunking many myths in the process.
From revealing unvarnished truths about going into labor to enduring postpartum depression, these books examine not only the act and art of parenting, but also how it impacts the identity of the birthing person—their sacrifices, compromises, and joy. Across genres and themes, these books will have you thinking twice about what it means to mother (and be mothered).
Below, six books that’ll make you think differently about motherhood.
Sarah Hoover, The Motherload: Episodes from the Brink of Motherhood
This candid essay collection rips apart taboos while making space for mothers who have had difficulty connecting with their child. Hoover, a successful gallerist in New York City, had always planned on starting a family. But after becoming pregnant, she began to experience a low-thrumming disassociation. Eventually, she felt out of control. Writing honestly with a delicate touch, Hoover's essays are unflinching and brave, especially regarding details of her own postpartum depression and disconnection to her her newborn son. This courageous book normalizes fears and challenges that so many have been told to swallow or silence.
Miranda July, All Fours
Arguably best known as the book that came for everyone’s group chat, All Fours is a study of midlife, motherhood, marriage, and identity. At the top of the novel, an unnamed artist decides to leave her husband and child, driving from her home in L.A. to New York City. But less than an hour on the road, she takes a detour and unknowingly embarks on an exploration of her sexuality and creativity, reconnecting with sides of herself that had been left unattended, realized by a chance encounter with a younger man.
But this is only the first half. Momentum really picks up after the narrator returns home and subsequently struggles to resettle into her life. In tracing her spiral into uncertainty, yearning and perimenopause, this novel will have you come for the horny chaos and stay for the existential crisis (and seriously satisfying ending).
Torrey Peters, Detransition, Baby
Motherhood looks different for everyone, a sentiment that's expertly depicted in Torrey Peters’s debut novel, which follows a trans woman living in NYC named Reese. Brokenhearted after parting ways with her ex-girlfriend who’s decided to detransition and become Ames, Reese loses herself in booze and the beds of married men. Ames isn’t having the easiest time, either. But when his new lover falls pregnant, Reese and Ames reconsider how they could, perhaps, each play a role in the child’s life. This big-hearted novel doesn’t shy away from tough topics, sparking understanding and emphasizing the beauty of family, however you choose to define it.
Paloma Faith, MILF: Motherhood, Identity, Love and F*ckery
Feeling some type of way over the double standards mothers (and, let’s be honest, most women) encounter? This book is for you. Written by podcaster, singer, actress and all-around personality, Paloma Faith, this heartfelt and hilarious book pulls no punches about the compromises, thrills, and WTFs of motherhood. Faith provides an astute, at times scathing, look at the expectations of mothers today. Undergoing IVF and parting ways with her children’s father, she is open about the everyday discord she finds herself in while keeping two tiny humans alive. If you’ve ever needed a gut check if you’re crazy, or just suffering at the hands of the patriarchy, you’ve come to the right place.
Taylor Harris, This Boy We Made: A Memoir of Motherhood, Genetics, and Facing the Unknown
Despite the hefty research confirming the disparities in healthcare that Black mothers (and women) receive in medical settings compared to their white counterparts, it remains an insidious and devastating issue. Taylor Harris gives a face to these challenges in her memoir, which traces her own quest for answers after her young son, Toph, unexpectedly becomes ill. Harris expertly weaves together her struggles with anxiety, caring for her other children, confronting racism in venues meant to offer care, and embarking on the relentless pursuit to help Toph. This is a tough, yet necessary, read to learn about one woman’s perseverance, no matter what’s flung in her way.
Domenica Ruta, All the Mothers
Author Domenica Ruta is no stranger to investigating relationships between mothers and daughters. Her 2013 memoir, With or Without You, recounts her difficult childhood being brought up by a mother who struggled with mental health issues and addiction. Now, the author returns with a novel, out May 6, that digs into the other side of the equation.
All The Mothers follows Sandy, a single mom to Rosie, the unplanned result of a dating app meetup. Sandy delights in motherhood—if only co-parenting were as rewarding. Rosie’s father, a burgeoning rockstar has, apparently, sprayed his star power all over the city, and Sandy soon learns that Rosie has a half-sibling. In a truly cosmic twist, Sandy realizes that she and the other mother may have more in common than just their children's father. Reengineering the classic love triangle trope, this novel smashes the woman vs. woman dynamic.